What an adventure of a camping trip this past weekend was! It was super fun, surprisingly shortened, and a trial of my coping strategies that both succeeded and failed. Let me just comment throughout the picture reel....
We went to the same site as last year, not at a campground, but around several other camping parties. Our original spot was taken, but we found another great location further down the road that still gave us access to several beautiful lakes, lots of space, and the creek. We arrived Saturday around 1ish (I think?) and had camp set up in just a few hours. It was noticeably cooler from the moment we stepped out of the car-the kids all donned jackets right away.
Our new canopy-came in very handy!
Our two-tent set up. Karianna and Sara slept in the green 4-man tent, and the rest of us were in our large 10-man tent (which I think is on its last leg since it tends to leak during storms.
Jackson loves balls on any normal day ,but especially loved throwing and chasing balls around the campsite.
The whole crew-our family, plus Robert, Rachel, and Stephen.
As with last year, all the kids did great around the campfire. Jackson worried me a little bit, but he ended up being just as great with it-mesmerized, but smart enough to not touch. See that green string? Its keeping his binky attached to his body. I couldn't find the binky-keeper thingie before we left since he doesn't use it much anymore, especially during the day. So I improvised, since I knew he would probably need it for camping.
I love my hat. Just had to say that.
James LOVED adding kindling to the fire-he was not afraid at all.
Can you see what Sara is pointing to?
BEES! Robert said he has seen something like this before, it is called a Bee Beard, and it literally looked like a blanket of bees draped over this branch on both sides. They were pretty docile and stayed like this the entire time we were there. So amazing-and about 100 yards from our campsite!
We were singing songs, and this was Jackson dancing!
Jared is the cook when we go camping-he is so great at all, which is all the more impressive since we had a large group! Steaks and hot dogs for dinner one day, chicken fajitas with peppers for dinner the second day, biscuits and gravy for breakfast one day, and what would have been breakfast burritos the second day-so yummy.
Once night started to fall, Jackson started getting pretty fussy-it was cold, and he was obviously tired. I took him into the tent at one point, and we say primary songs and read a few of his favorite books. I got him to laugh-love this happy baby!
As usual, the first night was hard for me. We stayed up late talking and playing the question game with all the kids, which was actually quite fun. Jordan eventually asked when they would get to go to bed, so all the kids went to bed at the same time. Jackson fell asleep immediately, but woke up within 45 minutes or so crying. He came out to the campfire and immediately fell asleep in Jared's arms while the adults kept talking. When we eventually turned in, he fell right back to sleep in his pack and play in our tent. Jared and I dove under our multiple blankets on our air mattress and talked/listened for Fablehaven for a long time. I get extremely anxious at night, and it is really difficult for me to relax, especially when everyone else is asleep. I don't like being in the middle of nowhere. But Fablehaven gave me something to focus on, and I listened to a good chunk of it since I didn't get much more than 2 hours of sleep. Jackson slept in 30-40 minute intervals until about 3 in the morning when he just seemed scared that he didn't know where he was, so he snuggled in bed with Jared and I and fell asleep. That was actually very sweet for me, he is getting too old to do that at home-I can't even remember the last time he fell asleep in my arms. It was a beautiful sight to see him tucked in with Jared and I. The last time I looked at my watch it was just after 4am and i dozed off. The boys of course woke up at 6am, though they acquiesced to reading in their beds and looking at pokemon cards until about 8am when we finally got up to play; I even put Jackson back in his bed to just play so I could doze. What a long night-I felt very grateful that it was over. Honestly, those two hours between 6 and 8 were blissful because it was getting light, others were awake, and I could finally relax a bit. I love camping, nights are just so difficult.
Family pictures around the campsite-this huge fallen log was great!
Love this picture!
First glance, and I thought this was Karianna! It's not!
JD took the challenge of digging this enormous rock out of the ground, and he did it. It took him forever!
Playing with weird worms found while digging.
One of the highlights: learning how to use the slingshots! these things are so much fun-I really loved doing this myself, and the kids all became quite proficient at loading their own rocks and firing!
Father and Son
JD was the first out of everyone-adults included-to hit one of the targets! there should be two water bottles there-he hit one! It was super impressive!
The older kids went hiking with Rob, Rachel, and Stephen while Jared and I taught JD how to do the slingshots first. After all that action, we did lunch and rested for a bit-especially Jackson. Karianna took him into the tent just to hang out while I was cleaning up around the campsite, and when I came in to give Karianna her lunch, Jackson had just laid down and fallen asleep on the sleeping bags! He looked so adorable, and so tired! The tent was blissful to me-it was so cool outside, and the tent was like a sauna. I got to rest for a bit as well, which was so needed after my restless night.
For the afternoon, we took off to one of the nearby lakes, nestled right in the middle of the pine trees and right up on the rim. It was, hands down, the most beautiful lake I have ever seen. The water was so beautiful, and the multiple rock outcroppings that ringed the water were breakthtaking. We hiked around the lake for quite some time, taking in the different views and taking pictures along the way. We got a few sprinkles, but that was it, and by the time we were done, we were all somewhat warm!
The rain started coming down in small bursts when we got back-it would rain for a bit and then stop, and then start, and then stop, and so on. During one of the stops, I pulled out the bubble machine and the kids danced around in front if it for a while. Jackson seemed scared of the bubbles, which was comical! I loved that the older kids, who are normally too cool for this kind of stuff, joined right in.
With Jackson being terrified of the bubbles and all, I took him into the tent for a while to calm down. Eventually I had 4 kids in the tent since it was raining, and with Jared working on dinner, it was hard to get everyone under the canopies. The boys ate dinner in the tent with me, and though we tried to go out a few times, it was just raining a little too much to stay out for long-so in the tent we stayed, and I got colder. It was then that I felt those tendrils of anxiety creeping up again. It was only 6ish, and I got worried that I was already feeling nervous. In my mind, it was cold, wet, and I had no way to remedy that in our current surroundings. Jackson's fingers were cold, i could not get warm despite being wrapped up in a few blankets, and I started to worry that I was going to have to work through these feelings for the next 12 hours until light the next day. I did it successfully the night before, but the thought of doing it again was so overwhelming.
I worked through these thoughts for about half an hour with the boys playing around me when Jared poked his head in to make sure everyone was okay. I broke. I told Jared I was struggling, and I just started crying. He sat with me for a bit, reminded me to breathe, and I tried, I really tried. The boys were quiet, and I knew they felt my anxiety. Jared asked me if I wanted to leave, and I tried to choke out that no, I didn't want to, I felt bad for everyone else, but I didn't know how to deal with this. Jared calmed me down again and said he would go talk to the other guys for a minute to clue them in. As soon as he left, I started crying again. JD, bless his loving heart, scooted over to me on the bed, put his arm around me, and told me it was going to be okay. He asked me what was wrong, and I whispered through my tears that I was just nervous. He told me it would be okay again, and I felt a lot of comfort with my amazing 8 year old next to me. Unfortunately, my fears just would not subside, and I started having a panic attack. I told JD to get Dad, which he did, and I started hyperventilating and struggling to breathe. Jared held me and coached me through some breathing exercises to calm down, which I finally did. He told me everyone was supportive of leaving, and that we could pack up right now and take off. It was 7:30pm at this point, and still raining, but as much as I hated to admit it, it is what I needed to hear. I could not imagine working through another night, and as bad as I felt, I needed to go, and Jared was so supportive.
So we started packing up in a great hurry. We had about half an hour of light, intermittent rain for the first hour or so, and only flashlights thereafter. I packed up our tent in record speed, JD and Jordan were the biggest helps, James and Jackson stayed with me and kept me sane, and Karianna and Sara completely packed up the inside of their tent. Everyone was working together so well, and that made me feel better about our hurried departure. Robert, Rachel, and Stephen were wonderful. I felt so bad, I told them I was so sorry as i was cutting down the tarps, and just started crying again. They wrapped me up in a big hug and told me it was totally okay. I have great siblings and in-laws. Stephen said, these are the moments that built family bonds-how you react in hard situations says a lot about a person. Well, everyone's reactions to my shortcoming said a lot about them, and I am proud to call my family, family.
We finally got everyone packed up and in the car by 9:15. The tents and tarps were too wet to pack up, so we just folded them and laid them in the back of the van. The kids sat in the car in the warm heater for the last 45 minutes of packing, and Karianna did an amazing job babysitting Jackson in the front seat of the car. All of us adults worked together to break down camp, take down the potty tent in the distance, get the canopy put away, and put out the fire. As we drove away, I felt my anxiety leeching away. I still felt terrible for taking away that last overnight from the others, and I already missed playing games around the campfire as a way to asauge my anxiety.....sometimes I wonder if i could have stuck it out. But the decision was made, and I felt so much relief the closer we got to home.
So our camping trip was unexpectedly shorter than we anticipated, but we made some terrific memories that I absolutely treasure-and that far outweigh the negative. We probably won't go camping as a whole family again this summer, but the older kids are already looking forward to camping with Jared a few more time before school starts. Interesting times-so grateful for my wonderful family.
